i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.