Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
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