and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
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