just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
Randomize
