i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.