I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
This is the prime rib incident all over again
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
I did not marry a roomba.
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