I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
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