Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
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she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
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I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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