I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
Randomize
