why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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