he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
just found out that she named her cat after me.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
