singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Randomize