Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
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