am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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