She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
Randomize
