i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize
