I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
Randomize
