It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Randomize
