her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
Randomize
