Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Just cropdusted the office
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Randomize
