I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
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