Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
Randomize