WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
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