Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tornado booty call.. dedication
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
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