at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Randomize
