just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Randomize
