At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
Randomize
