Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
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