I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
The beer is more important than you right now.
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Randomize
