Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
Randomize
