i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
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