Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
I have already put on my inside pants.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
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