What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
He keeps bees of course he's weird
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
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