So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
