Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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