I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
Randomize
