funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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