I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
Randomize