new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
Randomize
