so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
Randomize
