im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
I just found a bag of teeth...
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
I AM VODKA MAN
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
