It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
Randomize
