I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize
