Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
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