so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.