woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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