how can u be prego again
I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize
