ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
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