I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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