Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Randomize
