i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
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